By Milica Yaksich

  In the last three steps St. John revealed to us how important it was to be mindful of what, how and how much we spoke for there are many ways in which we can sin through talk. Just as there was much in those steps that we could all relate to, I'm certain many will find that the next three steps address concerns that affect us all. In steps 13 (Tedium of the spirit) and 14 (Gluttony) we examine two vices: how to identify them and how to prevail against them. Step 15 (On Chastity) focuses on a virtue and how to attain it, and appropriately enough brings us to the halfway point of the Ladder.

STEP 13: ON TEDIUM OF THE SPIRIT

  Tedium in some writings is referred to as listlessness, distraction, despondency, or even boredom. In some ways it can be considered a combination of two vices: listlessness and dejection. In an age when so many find themselves or their neighbours depressed, bored, uninterested, in despair or even just somewhat lazy and uninspired, reflection on this subject is timely. What does St. John write about this? "Tedium is a paralysis of the soul, a slackness of the mind, a neglect of religious exercises, a hostility to vows taken. It is an approval of worldly things."

  It's the tiredness one feels when it's time to pray, the tiredness that isn't there just before or just after. It's the temptation to stay home on Sunday mornings instead of going to church and the restlessness one feels during the church service. It's the many things that come up to distract you from spiritual matters and the division and resentment that occasionally arises when one must choose between the spirit and the world. What could possibly be more important, more interesting or more validating than the improvement and salvation of one's own soul? Still, the chair or the couch draws us to rest and all our worldly cares and amusements distract us easily on a daily basis from that single most important purpose in life.

  Did you ever notice how just when you begin to pray, or stop to reflect on the state of your soul in preparation for holy confession, the phone rings, someone knocks at the door or a sound from the next room or from the street distracts you. The demon of tedium can be even more divisive. Tedium can strike into the depths of one's heart. It is the doubt that makes you question whether you are making any spiritual progress at all. It points out your failures and weaknesses and suggests that you are wasting your time. It preys on the fact that in this fast paced and instant world most people expect instant results. It's common for people to start something, become disillusioned with it, quit and start something else over and over again. St. John tells us that "perseverance in the course taken" is the way to fight this demon. The spiritual road is a long and difficult one and it is only through perseverance that we can reach our Lord and the salvation that awaits us at the end of that road. The other thing that St. John suggests can help in our struggle is the support of others who are engaged in the same struggle. Finding others who are likewise interested in the spiritual life and salvation can be encouraging and help us over the rough spots. Reading the stories of the saints reminds us of what they endured and how they persevered. It lets us know that we are not alone in our struggle.

  Tedium is a silent evil that makes us forget about God and faith and heaven and final judgement. It distracts us with worldly troubles, changes our focus quickly and often, frequently to the extent that we abandon what is most worthwhile in life. St. John tells us that "the singing of psalms and manual labour" are tedium's opponents and it's "enemy is the thought of death, but what really slays tedium is prayer backed by a firm hope in the blessings of the future."

STEP 14: ON GLUTTONY

  "Gluttony is hypocrisy of the stomach. Filled, it moans about scarcity; stuffed and crammed, it wails about its hunger. Gluttony thinks up seasonings, creates sweet recipes. Stop one urge and another bursts out; stop that one and you unleash yet another. Gluttony has a deceptive appearance; it eats moderately but wants to gobble everything at the same time."

  Family feasts, social gatherings, evenings out, all center around food, and all too often lead to gluttony. There is more, however, to gluttony than just over indulging in food and drink; spiritually such unrestraint leads to all manner of unrestraint. St. John writes that "The belly is the cause of all human shipwreck" and "Gluttony is the prince of the passions". He points out that lack of self control in one area suggests lack of self control in other things as well. "The mind of someone intemperate is filled with unclean thoughts. The man who looks after his belly and at the same time hopes to control the passion of fornication is like someone trying to put out a fire with oil." All the passions are connected and St. John warns us that we cannot win our spiritual struggle with the passions if we allow any one of them to be uncontrolled. We already examined the spiritual dangers associated with talking, so let us heed St. John when he tells us, "The tongue flourishes where food is abundant." It is clear that gluttony paves the way for all manner of other sins and ultimately spiritual death. It is more than hunger that can never be satisfied, it is insatiability in everything. A gluttonous spirit would devour everything in sight and still want more. That is because it is not about supply and demand. It is only about demand. Gluttony is hunger; it is unfulfillment, insatiability, the inability to be satisfied or content. All too often, we eat out of habit, and any bad habit is hard to break. Those who struggle with their weight know that food can represent other things that are lacking in a person's life. It is quite common in this abundant modern society to reach for food when the problem or the need is really something else.

  On the other hand, there are those who have completely surrendered to worldly things and think little or nothing about death or life beyond this one or their soul. St. John states. "A full stomach dries up one's weeping." This refers to a lack of repentance that leads to spiritual death. Eating is not the culprit. We need to eat to live. Why we eat, how much we eat and what we eat, will determine if we are nourishing our body or starving our soul.

  If gluttony could tell us about herself this is what St. John suggests she would say: "Why are you complaining, you who are my servants? How is it that you are trying to get away from me? The reason for my being insatiable is habit. Unbroken habit, dullness of soul, and the failure to remember death are the roots of my passion. And how is it that you are looking for the names of my offspring? For if I were to count them, their number would be greater than the total of the number of the grains of sand. Still, you may learn at least the names of my firstborn and beloved children. My firstborn son is the servant of Fornication, the second is Hardness of Heart, and the third is Sleepiness. From me flow a sea of Dirty Thoughts, waves of Filth, floods of unknown and unspeakable Impurities. My daughters are Laziness, Talkativeness, Breezy Familiarity, Jesting, Facetiousness, Contradiction, Stubbornness, Contempt, Disobedience, Stolidity of Mind, Captivity, Boastfulness, Audacity, Love of Worldly Things, followed by Impure Prayer, Distracted Thoughts, and sudden and often unexpected Catastrophes, with which is linked that most evil of all my daughters, namely, Despair."

  To those victorious over this vice St. John advises, "hasten towards dispassion and total chastity."

STEP 15: ON CHASTITY

  God gave us free will and with it the responsibility for our own souls. We choose whether to succumb to sin or whether to oppose it and by opposing it, follow the will of God. This does not mean, however, that we can do it all alone. Nowadays there is so much emphasis on being "masters of our own bodies", as if to say, "my body, my soul", that we forget about or discount God as part of the equation. Yes, there is such a thing as self-control and restraint and just saying no, but along with that we need to recognize that we are not alone and that just as a child needs parental help, we also need the help of our Heavenly Father. This is essential in the pursuit of purity and virtue. We can examine all the pitfalls, tests, and rewards, but it is to no avail if we do not recognize that we need the help, strength and grace that can only be granted by the Lord, Himself. The armour and weapons needed to fight such a battle can only be secured through faith, and then only if God deems us worthy. St. John writes: "The man who decides to struggle against his flesh and to overcome it by his own efforts is fighting in vain. The truth is that unless the Lord overturns the house of the flesh and builds the house of the soul, the man wishing to overcome it has watched and fasted for nothing. Offer the Lord the weakness of your nature. Admit your incapacity and, without your knowing it, you will win for yourself the gift of chastity."

  "The gift of chastity" must sound strange and even incomprehensible to most people at present. Never in the history of man has human sexuality, nudity and everything associated with carnal desire been so openly and explicitly available and unavoidable. On television, at the movies and in magazines we are confronted not only with images intended to arouse and seduce, but also with numerous sinful scenarios being presented as perfectly innocent and acceptable. Characters in popular T.V. sit-coms change partners and go through relationships, marriages and divorces as often as some people change clothes. Between shows, commercials openly endorse sexual activity by promoting condoms, sexy lingerie, phone sex and videos, while others run campaigns to promote abortion and birth control. Sexual scandals that once would have deprived kings of their thrones have no effect on lives or careers beyond boosting media ratings and newspaper sales for a short time. Before we can even begin to teach morality and instill values, our children have already been desensitized and exposed to immoral images and ideas. What is worse, we have all become desensitized and indifferent to some extent. There is no outrage because there is no longer any clarity. In an age of warped political correctness, it has become more offensive to proclaim virtue and chastity than fornication and sodomy.

  So, are we to understand that all sex is a sin? Certainly any form of sexual activity is a sin when it is outside of Holy Matrimony blessed by the church. In the scriptures there are many places where we are told that adultery, fornication, sodomy, uncleanness, lewdness, etc. are wrong and can lead to spiritual death because they will prevent us from inheriting God's kingdom.

  "The chaste man is not someone with a body undefiled, but rather a person whose members are in complete subjection to the soul." St. John recognizes that we are all subject to these feelings, but as with everything it is necessary that we control them instead of letting them control us. He goes on to explain, "A chaste man is someone who has driven out bodily love by means of divine love, who has used heavenly fire to quench the fires of the flesh." What this means is that sexual feelings and desires can be changed, transfigured by faith and divine love. Those who are not married must fight to rid themselves of passions and sexual desire and through faith change it into heavenly love and spiritual fulfillment. Those who are married have God's blessing to express their love spiritually and physically within the confines of their marriage. Some interpret marital love as only for the purpose of procreation, but it goes beyond that. The union of a man and woman in Holy matrimony is a union of love wherein they are described as being of one flesh. Their physical union is transfigured by the grace of God into something pure and holy.

  Sex outside of marriage is dangerous and destructive physically, socially, psychologically, and spiritually. Physically there are many terrible diseases and abuses of the flesh. Socially there are many traps. On the one hand, there is temptation to do everything and anything, while on the other hand there are those who will judge, condemn and stigmatize with a harshness that is both unrelenting and unforgiving. Young people rarely consider the consequences of their actions, not just in terms of pregnancy and disease, but also in terms of how others will regard them, or even how they will feel about themselves later in life. Psychologically there are scars from all the images, feelings, and experiences that are burned into one's psyche from pornography and other ill-advised sexual experience. Innocence lost truly is lost.

  Sex without love, self-gratification, and casual sex are all the same in the sense that they are essentially one-sided. Even when there is another person there, it has little to do with them because there is no bond, no relationship, and no love. The other person is simply a means to an end, to be exploited, used, and nothing more. Feelings are hurt, people become desensitized and it becomes harder and harder to form long-lasting and meaningful relationships. In the end, there is no fulfillment, no contentment, no love and no joy. The release of such sexual pursuits where there is no love, no commitment, no higher spiritual union, become obsessive and unfulfilling. The difference between man and animals is that man has a soul. When man acts like an animal, it is perhaps because he is acting as if he has no soul.

  How can we win such a battle? Chastity begins in the mind. We need to guard our thoughts and fight against any evil thoughts that enter our minds. We should refrain from fantasies and avoid looking at or listening to anything unchaste. We should protect our innocence and purity as we would that of our children. If we would not want to expose a young child to it, why would we consider it acceptable to expose ourselves to it? Why would we allow our senses to be brutalized? Most importantly, we must pray and keep busy with good works.

  This is perhaps the most difficult virtue to attain, and it is for that reason St. John writes, "He who has earned it while still alive has died and been resurrected. From now on he has a taste of the immortality to come."

Page 1 of 3